Life has been quite a busy whirlwind! Since June, I have been doing my DIY post-bacc and preparing my medical school application for the upcoming cycle. After graduating form university, I had the once in a life time opportunity to travel all across Europe. My IG followers probably already know and really saw a lot of footage and photos of my trip! I posted designated IG highlights of each city I went so if you are interested hope on over!
However, it was quite a busy week right after I finished finals/ the week before I went on my trip. I realized a program I wanted to join for mentorship had their application due in the next week where I would already be in Europe. I knew I needed to submit this application beforehand so even after finishing finals, I was still on the grind. It took me till around 5pm Thursday before my flight did I finish writing a personal statement from scratch as well as 3 secondary type essay questions. Boy, I was worn out but I still had to scramble to pack for my flight at 6am the next day.
6 weeks later coming back home from the trip, I had a week to recover and get things organized because I was starting another round of post-bacc courses, this time a full course load.
Moving back home and commuting 40 miles one way to class 2-3 times a week was quite a lifestyle change. All my friends have either move back home, found a job, or pursuing graduate education. Sitting in LA traffic and dealing with inattentive drives did change my temperament 😅.
However I had more time to spend time for myself and on myself. Slowly, I enjoyed again my own company. I hadn’t stepped into a shopping mall in the longest time in the States and had a great time shopping and treating myself to my favorite thing at 85 Bakery (L Passion fruit green tea, less ice 😎). In addition, I more time to catch up with friends around the area! I started journaling and was more self reflective, especially since I had to be writing for my med school application.
Had a mini weekend vacation in San Diego catching up with the best-est of friends. Although I barely got any sleep that weekend, I hadn’t felt more alive in the longest time enjoying the music we love in downtown.
Although there were several highs, I had a lot of lowest of the lows I haven’t felt for a long time. I had to let go things I didn’t want to let go, but I realized I had to finally respect myself. Many times I would feel burnt out, searching and writing applications for jobs and research. I would get anxious about my class work due to the intense pressure more than ever having to do exceptionally well in classes.
🌑 🌒 🌓 🌔 🌕 🌖 🌗 🌘
There was a week were I felt super depressed. I had no motivation to do any work I needed to do and felt emotionally dead. Socially media is the highlight reel and not often do you see someone pulling themselves out of their own ditch. And that is where the power self-love and mindset is needed the most.
Imagine being with someone for the rest of your life who doesn’t support you, doesn’t motivate you, doesn’t love you the way you want to be treated. Imagine being with someone 24/7 that isn’t successful, isn’t well kept, isn’t someone you would hang out with, and isn’t someone you want in a life partner.
That would suck right? Who would want to be with someone like that? That’s why it is so fundamental to work on yourself, because you are the person you are going to spend the rest of your life with 24/7. If you don’t like yourself, make this the motivation to improve everyday. Take the step everyday to love yourself again. Self-love is a forever process and journey. Having a positive mindset is so important. It is hard to do, even in the most negative situations; therefore, it is something that has to be practiced. Learning to not dwell on the negativity and stopping yourself when you feel this way all takes practice. Your brain needs to train like a muscle. We need to think of mental health the same way as physical health.
Through all the ups and downs, my mental clarity has been the best it has been for years and I am working on getting it better. I am enjoying life even though I am not where I want to be and with all the uncertainty of the future. Life, especially life as a human, is so crazy. There is so much out there to see, to have, to feel, to experience with the little time we have on this Earth. I enjoy the smaller things now, like making my morning tea, because I know I wouldn’t be able to at home when one day I am off away to the next chapters of my life.
Now that it is finally winter break (btw got a 4.0 ayyy!!!) I can finally have time for more self reflection and sharing things I love here on my blog and IG! I have decided to ✨blogmas✨the rest of December mainly focusing on skin-care so far! If you are interested in my holy grails, they will be under the Beauty>Skin-care section!
If you have read this far, thank you so much for caring! I hope something in here resonates with you and I am always rooting for your success. 💖